Split to Sarajevo :D

Hi there again fellow earthlings,

after leaving the town of Zagreb, where the busking was good and I made enough to earn back the hostel I stayed in last night and almost enough to pay for the nighttrain I took the second day heading for Split.

A very touristy yet beautifull coastal town on the Adriatic coast. The town has lots of Roman remnants and is packed with tourists... so I was going to busk!!!

my busking ground :

I met Yutaku on the train that night, he's a really fun japanese guy that's planning to study psychology next year, his english is enjoyably tolerable and he attracts girls like crazy, who knoys why... they all seem to know him.

Anyways, we spent the night in one traincabin and got to know eachother, had a good nightrest since it was just us in the cabin and so we each had a place to lay and sleep.
In the morning we woke up and luckily the train had had some delay(kind of usual in these countries) and we had a long enough sleep. We split a chocolate croissant I had brought and hung our head through the window to feel the sweet morningbreeze and enjoy the amazing landscape, getting towards the coastline was so beautiful and we could see the train wind and turn and it was sooo beautiful, old-school train, no electricity!!
We had early morning coffee upon arriving and I decided to spend the day busking and take the night bus out of there again, too much tourists for me, thought about going to Dubrovnik. We split ways and I found a really great place to play, made a bunch of Croatian Kunas and when noon came and the tourist traffic started to go down I went to the beach, where I found Yutaku again (all the girls call him picachu ;) ). I was glad because it's nice to have some companionship and he's good to hang out with, and I could go swimming while he watched my bags.

The adriatic is salty and awesome, you can float very easily and the waves are mild... nothing like the mediterranean waves I had had in Franc with my friend Johan a few years ago on our hitchhing trip to Barcelona, those guys were huge!!!

Anyways, swam then got out, cooked some food together with Yutaku, who seemed to enjoy my company as well and then set out to busk again for the evening.
I played for an hour or so and made really good money, amazing how good it is over here! It's in their culture someone told me to appreciate music in this way. And the banjo was a success!!! I had chosen well when I started my trip...

cooking with yutaku:


and the alcohol stove - shit these pictures are a luxury- :
check zen and the art of alcohol stoves if interested :p

Anyways, Yutaku came by to see me a few times and brought me a bottle of water, some other people gave me beer and while yutaku was sitting across the street listening a bunch of very pretty swedish girls came by and started jumping and screaming from joy to see yutaku again..... jeezz amazing.

Anyway they all came over and asked me to go fro a beer, how could I refuse??
They turned out to be really nice girls, though quite young 19--

(yutaku surely liked one of them and has since decided to go to Sweden :D).

I went to Dubrovnik with the 1:30 am bus, had a hell of a bad sleep and found myself jaded and depressed from exhaustion in Dubrovnik, being asked a hundred times (in a very funny way); 'boy, need room' . 'boy, boy, good accommodation, stay with me' ' boy need apartment'. It's like an invasion of elderly people at that busstation trying to sell you a room in their house, crazy shit, as soon as you show some interest they're on you :D.
Anywas I ran and went for coffee, and a chocolate croissant, they seem to be getting bigger every time (now I'm in Sarajevo and they're huge!!!- and cheap).

I tried to check into the hostel, they sent me away until twelve, it was yet too early, didn't really like the town too much, read like crazy in a herman hesse book (steppenwolf), found it to be very resonating with some of my feelings and thoughts of the last months, and found myself in some form of overexhausted emotional alchemic limbo, trying to fight melancholy and homesickness in the heat of day... I needed love and a nap!
And I wanted to know if there was gonna be somebody waiting for me in Istanbul or not, blast the whole damn circus, the strange games and myths a man can spin around himself, his selfcreated delusions, trying to make a good story of ones life, it all seemed so swooped in a sweaty engulfing selfsickness.
Anyway, all emotions pass I said to myself and the only way to get to higher ground and a clearer perspective is to wait and do nothing... so I did.
And after I went to the hostel, checkled in, knew right away it was too expensive and I don't like Hostelling International at ALLLL...

Fuck that, net a nice german dude, Johan, full of life and craziness, went swimming with him off this cliff rock shore.. wasn't really a beach, just a stairs down to the water, and a little carved out rocky place to sit, and a stairs to get back out of the water... sooo beautifull, the adriatic I love it. We jumped in, and I was wearing this little shitty underpants that I though was gonna drop off any moment when I jumped in, so that made me nervous with kids around and some older Kroatian men and women... anyways, did it anyway.

Then tried to finish the book, read about winedrinking and got myself a bottle of wine as well. Met a nice austrian guy at the hostel Martin, had a good talk about Celts, history, nationalism and Africa. He worked for a company that did development work there, so it was surely interesting to talk with him. I met him again since a few times, he's travelling around by bike, one day when I was busking in Sarajevo he droppen 5 euro in my hat... thanks man!!!

Anyways, tired of Dubrovnic I planned to leave it the next day, visited the old town and busked for an hour till I had enough for the train to Medjugorje. A christian pilgrimage place where the virging mary still appears weekly or so.
My father goes there every year with a group pilgrimage organised by one of his friends, who is this kind of christian clairvoyant, hands on healer. At least he says so, but I like him... strange fellow, he gave me an amethyst before I started travelling, it's really pretty... anyways, I thus went to Medjugorjie and arrived there in the evening, had some magic fantasies on the way up there listening to Buffy st Marie sing God is alive Magic is a Foot... so I was in the mood for the place, hoping to find to magic energy, something that could revitalise my view on christianity or at least something I could recognise... i'm open to way to many different things...

My dad had arranged some accomodation before my arrival. It was night when I arrived by bus, the landscape had been magnificent, and crossing the border to Bosnia I hadn't gotten a stamp on my passport(too bad), just a few suspicious looks and an approving nod. Happy to be in another country again though.
I asked some people in one of the rosary, mary statues shops for the adress I was going to be staying. With a fellow named Zoran, someone my dad seemed to like and know personally. I had to walk up to apparition mountain, the girl advised me to take a taxi because it was 2 kilometers... yeah right!!
Anyways as I was walking past the stores and little restaurants I decided to ask my way again in a little shop called 'the conversion', and was greeted and welcomed by a very friendly expatriate american named Genaro, originally from mexican descent, grew up in the bay area, san Yaquin valley, and used to be a us Marine. Before his conversion that is. He was a very friendly man and knew the Zoran I was going to, called him up and told me Zoran was coming to pick me up.
Genaro seemed really siked that someone was there to talk to and offered me a little Medjugorjie map and a mini Mary figurine as a gift, how could I refuse this nice man... He told me that when he did good to others, god would pay him back for that in the end.. or something like that. He offered me if I passed by there the next days to talk a while, it felt good to meet someone whose language I was fluent in and ofcourse I agreed.
Zoran showed up in his nice VW passat car and told me he didn't have place for me but I would be staying with his brother, if felt happy that everything was so well arranged for me... I arrived at Zdravo, Zorans brothers hotel/house where Zdravo was drinking hard with an older Belgian 'couple', they ofcourse offered me to join in, poured me a full glas of local white wine, and asked me tons of stuff.

The man of the couple was called patrick but he called himself Tony soprano (and physically resembled him so, only a little bigger still), and said he was the belgian Maffia. A selfmade multimillionair who on top of all his earnings from the wine industry, had tons of hotels, won the euro millions lottery, had shares in Iphone sales and the such... he liked to talk about all his money. And Man did he like vodka, he gulped down two bottles that night...

I wound up playing banjo for my new audience, and repeatedly asked for Will tura songs and other flemish standards... couldn't comply though... They settled for some Kenny Rogers.

Anyway after the first meeting and asking me if I was on drugs ( :s )m they all offered to pay my stay... Patrick was investing in the company of Zdravo and in the rebuilding of Medjugorjie and Bosnie (he called the country shot to pieces), and he would pay for everything I needed, and if I ever wanted to stay in one os his hotels I could stay for free... nice man, lots of drink!

Anyway his lady went to bed and then he phoned his wife, who as he said it was a very young Egyptian thing living in France, he told her in druken french that he wanted a baby with her, I could hear her delightfully laughing through his Iphone.
Zdravo sighed and had another wine.
I know how easy it is to take on social conventional prejudice about this rich man behaviour, so I would try to take this man as serious a possible, he was in fact his own archetype. A being overcome by his own personal myth, and even though it wasn't a pretty one, it was still of more value and colour than the cynical middleclass puritanism, always finding the acceptable way. Trying to level away all intensities of life.
I could appreciate the man, but most possibly not indefinitely. I tried several times to go to bed, but repeatedly kept on the table, with wine and song requests.
I eventually got to bed though and had the craziest dreams-my only really identifiable spiritual experience at the pilgrimage-; I had a very lucid dream with lots of symbolism and eventually an older lady that walked up to me and I asked her what was wrong with me, she said a lot was really good, but there was still some disturbance, like the buzzing of someone else , some other entity in my system. She hugged me and I felt a buzzing warmth in certain parts of my body. The the dream continued and I found myself walking around lucidly dreaming, out of my body, but in the hotel I was staying at. I walked to my room and saw myself lying there and jumped into myself... that was a really crazy sensation and I woke up for a second and then went on dreaming about all kinds of stuff. I woke up smiling :D, and interested in the place, as some sort of powerplace. I took a shower in my own private shower, pissed on my private toilet (such luxury) and went down to meet Zdravo again, his wife served breakfast. I found myself in an empty hotel(one aimed at large pilgrim groups), Patrick and his lady had left early that morning, back to belgium.
Zdravo spoke some about Patrick and the war, and asked me what my plans were, I told him I would only be staying another 2 nights.
He excused himself for not having too much time for me, since he had another job in a construction company of his.
I headed out for town and walked my way all around the place, climbed the Krizevac mountain (symbolizing the passion of the Christ ins 12 steps), walked all around the town and then headed up on the Apparition hill and visited the Cenacolo. A Christian community for young boys that had been on drugs, a very dubious thing I found. There were signs at the entrance, one saing no smoking, the other no GIRLS!!!, and the last no music... god!!!
I later heard they only took in people that had already kicked the drugs, what made it seem even more unreal... anyways. I'm sure it could be a good thing, but had my doubts.

I found the place to be working on my nerves by the evening, and pushing me way out of my comfort zone. I was suddenly surrounded by all these puritans, antivitalists, pseudo ascetics, blatant tourism and Clergymen.

I went to mass that evening to push myself even harder, as I've found that inner resistance is something worthy of overcoming and can so lead to deeper insight... though I didn't find the eventual release and understanding of this ancient religion.

I found I could only appreciate it's beauty when not taking it too seriously and having a compassionate eye for all the trials and longings of the human being.

It's not because this religion, or this form of christianity does not work with my set of values, that it is not of value to others.

I took my peace with it in letting it be whatever it wanted to be.

When I tried to cope and understand it though I found all the end of the world, good-evil dualities, and all these very cliché antics to be inconsolable with my view at life.
I did find myself to be a very diverse ontological being though, I wouldn't call it schizophrenia, but rather a longing to live and understand every participating entities viewpoint to the fullest of possibilities. But now I found it left me with a substantial amount of residue and inner struggle. I needed a new consensus, a higher ground and a fuller understanding. All the new theories of before had again become old, it was time for the Harvest King of the I ching to be slaughtered, and all theory forgotten... I didn't find it in Medjugorje though and took the bus out of there after a few days.

I switched busses in Mostar, and walked around town for a few hours, saw the historic bridge and a town that was still pretty much shot up. Ruined old communist buildings, bullet holes and all the such. Also I found the air there to still feel tense and I was glad to take the bus out of there to Sarajevo.

We passed through some of the prettiest landscapes and I had a good feeling about my destination. That evening I arrived in Sarajevo and on the tram to downtown I met a nice Australian guy who happened to be going to a couchsurfing meeting. I joined him and met a whole bunch of nice people, among whom 3 really nice Bosnian kids. 2 really sweet girls and a young sarcast called Elan. He studied Civil engineering and had the same attitude and humor as my youngest brother.

I liked him because of that, and I don't think he fully understood why I got his humor, anyways... all of us went to this really cool club with nice live music, but I went to look for a hostel to sleep first as it was getting late. The 3 bosnian youngsters helped me find one and explain myself in this (to me) incomprehensible language. I found one, dropped my stuff there and went partying...
To my surprise, when I walked around in the club I found Yutaku, he was ver happy to see me and yes again surrounded by a bunch of pretty woman... 2 italians and a polish girl this time; she had been to Medjugorjie too she told me(them christian Poles :p) and a very nice Turkish guy. Next day I woke up kind of hung over and met Yutaku and the turkish dude again. Tried tome busking and made good money but the cops kept harassing me so I went for some lunch, a sendvic that is (sandwich with lots of stuff on it :D).

As I was sitting there with my banjo I met another Bosnian student and had a good talk about banjos, the war and world politics. He was very nice but antisemitic :s. Anyways he offered me coffee with a few serbian friends of his and we went to this awesome Sheesha/coffee/teahouse where I've spent many an afternoon so far, reading writing and having coffee. And where I am actually typing this...

one of the mosques of Sarajevo:

Anyway we had a great afternoon and I made some new friends. But then we parted and I went to play in the streets again, the cops were worse than ever and I eventually had to stop because they were getting angry at me... I didn't understand a word they were saying but was not looking forward to Bosnian Jail.

Robert whom I met in Ljubljana had told me about that comfort, and I wasn't very keen on experiencing it myself.

Luckily I met Yutaku again and agreed to meet for the night, I also met Johan again that day and smiled at a French girl I had seen around the backpacking circuit before... I went back to my campground and place my banjo in my tent and headed out to meet Yutaku at his hostel.
We met up with an Irish guy that went wild when we told him we were going 'clubbing' , he was awesome, I like Irish people. We walked towards the club and someone adressed us to help him push start his car, there we were the three of us pushing this tiny car along the Mula Mustafe Basiskije road in old town Sarajevo, where the traffic is insane and dangerous... Anyway we got to the club where a really awesome Psychedelic/electro band was playing with computers dj and electric guitar... awesome, after that there was an awesome girl rap rock band, the get together happened to be a feminist night... fucking A!!!
I tried to explain Yutaku what a feminist was, with little success of course, and he continued in his lovely Japanese way to try and meet many European girls... god he's funny.

Next day I yoke up, relaxed and happy for having had the joy of partying again, worried about the finances though, but was happy to be having a cheap camping.

I decided to buy one of these mini computers that are around now, they're not too expensive and I wanted to make myself write lots more... internetshops are expensive and not always available, and I want to get serious about writing more... something told my gut this was the right thing to do.

I also bought a bunch of yarn for very good price in a local yarn thread shop.
I found myself having supper with Yutaku again in one of the local food shops, xalled cevabnizica, where the sell cevapi, meat in a itta style piece of bread. I have since given up my vegetarianism, and although I regret my weakness, I enjoy the strength it gives me to eat well. Vegetarian food I hard to find here, and it's not always possible to cook myself.

I was starting a hat for Yutaku while we were waiting for our food, the serving lady was dressed as if in a fifties hollywood diner, with similar make up and hairdo. Anyways, as we had just started our dinner, this sweet french girl that I kept smiling at passed by and asked us if she could join us... and five minutes later Johan cam by too. We all had food and good talk while the rain was pouring all around us. The weather had changed in Sarajevo and it has been raining since.

Sofie (the french girl) was interested in the crochet and I agreed to show her over coffee or tea, yutaku wanted to learn Macrame, and Johan ha wanted to go party again... anyways I found myself teaching a french girl crochet and teaching Yutaku macrame in the coffee bar that night, having appletobacco pipes and the such.
People do not respont too well though to men doing crochet around here, in the best case they look at you kind of strange, but I had one men walking up to me and telling me it was nothing for me to do, but for Sofie... as she's a woman I guess. I have found these countries to be quite homophobic at times :p

Anyway we had a really nice alcohol free night and I made Sofie a mitten, in rainbowhued yarn, I agreed to make the second one and send it to her someday.

The next day Yutaku was leaving for Belgrade and I met this nice French couple staying at the guest house whose garden I was camping in...
My tent was soaked though and all my clothes wet, I stayed in the little garage like cellar (where the campgrounds toilet an shower were) but since I was the only one crazy enough for camping it became my private room. And I borrowed a rack from the owner to dry all my clothes.

I hung out with the french couple the next day, they didn't turn out to be a real couple though but were just two film students from paris that agreed to do a project together in Bosnia, about 'lines'. They were really friendly and we cooked together that evening and had a bunch of beer. I hung out with them ever since.

Now today I got my pc setup with some more software and I'm writing my ass off here to post this to my blog tonight, I will also make a new blog on Blogspot, with pictures and the such to be even more accessible and readable... For now I'll leave it with that, tonight I'm leaving on the night train to Belgrade where I'll stay one night and then pull on to Sofia to meet some very friendly couchsurfers that offered to take me hiking this weekend... sometimes I'm really lucky, and I know that even all the inner struggle that travell can bring, is actually a release, a freeing of the soul to more faith, deeper trust in life and just sheer good fun!!!

thank u all for reading,
much love and light

xox

steven